Ben Stein, the speechwriter of American presidents Richard Nixon and Gerald Ford, has once said; “the first step to getting the things you want out of life is this: Decide what you want.” Although it sounds easy, not many people seem to be able to decide what they want. Some find their passion too late to develop and others do not even realize what they really want to do. Despite the fact, however, I was fortunate that I got a chance to recognize early what I want.

     A few days before my third winter vacation began, my father told me to come and sit beside him. He was drinking coffee with my mother on the couch in the living room. They looked unusually serious. So instead of asking what was going on, I sat beside them quietly. After a few seconds of silence, he asked me if I wanted to learn Baduk professionally during the winter vacation. I was attending a private Baduk institution 3 days a week at the time. Then he added, for that I would have to leave home and the family for about 40 days.

     I was frightened. Although I liked playing Baduk, I did not think that I would leave my family to do so for such a long time. Yet, on the other hand, the expectation of the new experience thrilled me. It sounded like an adventure of a fairy tale. Besides, it was obvious that none of my friends would undergo such training. I instinctively wanted to surprise my friends by telling them about my unique vacation. Looking back, I think I said ‘yes’ to the parents, because I wanted to seem brave.

     The Baduk academy was located in Ilsan, Kyungki-do, around 3 hours away from home by car. The teacher was a professional Baduk player himself, and offered home-stay to the students who lived far away like me. My roommate was Yoo-Jin, the teacher’s daughter. She was a year younger than me, and also studying Baduk. As getting ready for the training, I vaguely expected it to be about 5 hours a day. In my third grade, I have taken 5 classes every Thursday in school, and I always regarded it a long journey since on every other day I studied less. The fact drove me to conclude that 5 hours should be long enough. But, I was wrong. From the very next day of my arrival, Yoo-Jin and I have walked to the Baduk academy by 9’o clock every morning, and got out at 9‘o clock. Therefore, even after subtracting 10-minute break that was occasionally given and 45-minute meal time for lunch and dinner, there were still about 9 hours for study.

     It was an endless repetition of many types of Baduk training. I played Baduk against peers, received comments on those games from the teacher, studied professional players’ game records, solved exercise problems and played Baduk again. Moreover, I had to memorize well-known games of prestigious players as homework! While I was suffering the tediously long study schedule, all I could do to entertain myself was to have a chat with Yoo-Jin when the teacher was absent or to go to a market for ice cream during break.

     About two weeks later, nevertheless, I began to be absorbed in the study. It was not merely because I got used to the living pattern, but I found myself improved in Baduk. Deeper understanding of Baduk and fewer mistakes clearly demonstrated that it was not an imaginary feeling but a visible development. The achievement brought me self-confidence and passion on the game. Consequently, my winning percentage went up significantly and it led me to play more seriously. Since then, studying Baduk no longer distressed me, but offered as much pleasure as hanging out with friends.

     On the day my parents came to take me home, my head was full of complicated feelings. I missed home. Playing with my sister, watching TV animation and walking to nearby park with the family had constituted my everyday life. Being outside home for a long time taught me how much I liked those moments. Yet, the new experience also showed me that there was a totally different life. I got close to Yoo-Jin, other peers and the teacher as well. Above all, I liked studying Baduk there. Just as I was about to leave, I fortunately realized that what I want the most is to stay where I was and keep studying Baduk. Ironically, wanting to seem brave led me to come there, and wanting to stay there made me brave. And, this time, it was my turn to ask the parents, “Could you let me stay here? I want to keep studying Baduk. I think I am ready to leave home for that.

     My parents seemed astonished, but respected my decision in the end. Even though I was determined and passionate, it was not always fun to study Baduk. There were frustrations and despair from many defeats and slumps which I had to overcome. In addition, I had to sacrifice school tasks, friends’ birthday parties and other fun activities. Yet, whenever I felt tough, I reminded myself of that it was not anyone else, but I, who decided to pursue this venture. As a result, my long perseverance got rewarded. In November, 2004 – about 7 years later – I received professional certification in the game of Baduk.




Hajin LEE - Essay for the university application